Defining My Dad

I was blessed with an amazing father. Having him die in 2010 has been a hard thing. I didn't realize how valuable just talking to him was. And that is what I did, talk to him. He pretty much just listened. He would pause the television and give me his undivided attention. He never said much, but when he did, I knew he saw inside my soul and was actually giving me in a few short words, meaningful counsel. My dad had some unique experiences in his life. I would like to share a few.



When I was small, my dad was in the Vietnam war. He was deployed for many months at a time, over and over again. Sometimes when he came home, I was not sure who he was. He was a navigator on the B-52 bomber and he flew over 360 combat missions. He didn't like to talk about his war service or the missiles the size of telephone poles that would come close to hitting his plane. Often when I think of losing my dad at the young age of 73, I think that I could have lost him much sooner with as many times as his life was in danger. My dad was a hero, and I am proud of him and his service to our country.



After the Vietnam War, my dad was rifted out of the Air Force by an illegal board. I don't remember seeing my father cry much, but I will never forget the day he walked in the door knowing he had a wife and four children to support and no job. It was heartbreaking.

But my dad did not give up, he went and got the coolest job a dad could have. He became a McDonald's manager. What kid doesn't want to eat at McDonald's whenever they can! I have never been a fan of pickles or mustard, but my dad would not let me order any specially made sandwiches. I had to take it like it came. I am sure he didn't want us kids creating extra work for his employees. I learned to take the pickle off and tolerate the tiny squirt of mustard on the cheeseburger. To this day, that is what I still do. When my dad would leave for work, we would say, "I love you all the way to McDonalds!" We still say this to each other...and even our children say it.



While my dad was working at McDonald's one night a couple of men came in to the store. One wanted to fill out an application. My dad gave him the paper and he sat down to complete it. When the man was finished, he walked behind the counter and to the back where my dad was. My dad told the man, "You can't be back here." It was at that point the man pulled a gun on my dad, put it up to his head and told him to open the safe." My dad said he always struggled with getting that safe open, but this particular time it opened on the first try. He gave the man the money. The man then tried to get my dad to go out the back door. My father refused. This was smart on my dad's part because the man very well might have shot him. The men left the store and the police were called. And my dad came home that night. Another time he could have lost his life much earlier.

While my dad was managing the McDonalds, he also began his own business of Home Security Shop. He would replace doors and locks on people's homes. He drove an orange VW van that kept his materials. He kept his small tools in a shaving kit and would often joke that he must have looked like a visiting gigolo when going to work on women's houses when the husband was at work! The van was a conversion van and had many nooks and crannies where he stored his tools. He would sometimes make the little kids crawl deep into the holes to retrieve something he needed. The back passenger seat held a foam mattress that we kids loved to play and ride on. We loved that van and thought it was so cool.



A few years later my dad was able to get a job at General Dynamics/Lockheed Martin. This job eventually moved us from Ft. Worth, Texas out to the Antelope Valley in California. My dad retired from this job and then joined my mom in Cedar City where she had moved earlier to get the house ready.

My dad was from a young age always active in church. He served in the Northern California mission. At that time you brought your own car on your mission. He remembers the last day of his mission hooting and hollering as he threw his hat out into the Pacific Ocean. He served in many callings through out his life, scout leader not being one of his favorites! He also served as bishop of the Lancaster 4th Ward. His favorite calling was that of membership clerk, a position he held many times.



My dad had a love for food. He never wanted very much, but he had his favorites. He loved steak, baked potatoes, and green beans with bacon. He made the best pancakes. When we were little he put chocolate chips in my sister's pancakes and crushed pineapple in mine. His favorite dessert was banana pudding. He could make a meal out of anything. We would often see him take a peach, add some cottage cheese and put the cherry on top. He had to make it pretty. Another one of his specialties was oatmeal and cinnamon toast. What I would give for him to make me breakfast again.



My dad loved to have fun. He loved to tell jokes, often forgetting the punch line. He talked to anyone he came in contact with...everyone was his friend. Once my dad got put on oxygen he would use the motorized carts to get around the stores. When Brandon had knee surgery and was hobbling into the grocery store, my dad challenged him to a race around the store in the motorized carts. Brandon got in trouble for riding in the cart...but once he showed them his knee surgery they let him continue on. My dad always had that cute little smirk whenever we would tell that funny story.



My dad was a lover of Western shows. He loved Bonanza and Gunsmoke. I think he had a crush on Miss Kitty :) I am sure this comes from his Texas heritage and growing up on a ranch. My dad was a cowboy. When he was little he had a horse named "Charlie" horse and his brother had a horse named "RB" horse. They rode their horses to school.



My dad loved to tell the story about being in class with Miss Bonnie Bell. He got in trouble with her when he pretended to drop his pencil just so he could kiss the girl sitting in the desk across from him as he bent down to pick his pencil up. Sneaky boy!



My dad went by many names in his life. He was Charles, Chuck, and Chuckie Poo. But to me, he was just Daddy. I love you Daddy and am so grateful you were with me as long as you were.